


Under the Spirits' Sign

by ashtraythief



Series: Drums 'verse [2]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Prehistoric, Hunters & Hunting, M/M, Self-Lubrication, mentions of mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-15
Updated: 2015-09-15
Packaged: 2018-04-21 00:17:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4807703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashtraythief/pseuds/ashtraythief
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After saving Jensen from a fate of slavery, Jared has one month to convince Jensen to stay with him. Unfortunately, Jared is not the only one vying for his favor.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Under the Spirits' Sign

**Author's Note:**

  * For [macaronielbow](https://archiveofourown.org/users/macaronielbow/gifts).



> equel for To the Beat of the Drums (jn which Jared rescues Jensen from a fate of slavery). Written for macaronielbow, who was kind enough to bid on me on the Fanworks Auction for cillab42. The muse was incredibly stubborn with this one, but I tried to pack as many of your likes in there as I could. Used as my smpc entry this month.  
> Many, many thanks to lotrspnfangirl and theatregirl7299 for the super speedy beta!
> 
> Please be aware that the hunting part of this fic includes the graphic killing of animals.

 

 

“Ladle.”  
  
Jensen tilts his head before he slowly says, “la-del.”  
  
He’s become better at pronouncing words in their language, but it’s still audible that he’s from far away. He stretches the vowels while other sounds are harder and more choppy, but Jared doesn’t correct him often, too pleased with Jensen’s progress.  
  
It has been little more than half a moon since the ceremony, and while communication is still difficult, Jared hopes that Jensen will stay with him. Their nights together are amazing, Jensen initiating physical contact often. Jared wasn’t inexperienced before Jensen, but it was never like what they have between them. Jensen is more beautiful than any person Jared has ever known and he moves with grace and strength, his body fitting against Jared’s like they were made for each other. During the day, he’s loving; smiling and laughing with Jared, studying their language with Sam, but sometimes… Sometimes Jared sees a shadow pass over Jensen’s features. He looks sadly out into the woods and falls quiet for long times. Jared guesses he misses his home and there is nothing he can do about that, except try to show Jensen that he will help him build a new home here, with him, and hopefully someday soon, their children.  
  
Jared goes back to stirring the rabbit stew they’re having for dinner while Jensen sews up a tear in his deerskin jacket. The skin is worn thin in places and he’ll need a new one soon. Jared will have to go hunt big game.  
  
Jensen stops, fingers tracing the beaten material, while his face closes off. Shit. Jared is supposed to take care of his bearer and he lets him walk around in beaten up furs.  
  
“I’ll go hunt tomorrow, okay?”  
  
Jensen looks up, head tilted to the side.  
  
“Hunt,” Jared says, gesticulating at the jacket. “Deer. I’m going to hunt a big animal and then you can make yourself a new jacket.”  
  
Jensen nods, but he doesn’t smile. “Yes,” he says in his deep voice. “Hunt.”  
  
Jared doesn’t understand where the sudden melancholy in his bearer’s eyes comes from, so he scoots over to him and draws him into his arms.  
  
“What’s going on, Jensen?”  
  
Jensen shakes his head in that helpless way he always does when the words aren’t enough to express what he wants to say.  
  
“Hunt,” is all he says and Jared wonders if he lost someone on a hunt.  
  
“I’ll be careful, I promise.”  
  
Jensen stays quiet.  
  
  
  
  
The first time Jared sees Jensen with a new bracelet, he thinks nothing of it. The members of their clan go out of their way to make the new bearers feel welcome. Since most of the newcomers didn’t bring anything with them, escaping the slavery in the grasslands with nothing but the clothes on their back, the clans-people provide them with clothes and all other things they could need.  
  
Jared and Jensen are sharing a meal — a big hare Jared caught and a vegetable mush Jensen made. It tastes different than what Jared is used to, but good. Jensen probably has a different way of using herbs.  
  
“It’s really good,” Jared says and smiles at Jensen.  
  
Jensen smiles back. “Thank you. Good hare.” He scrunches up his nose like he always does when he’s not pleased with what he said. “Big hare?”  
  
Jared nods. “It’s a big one, yes. And that’s good.”  
  
Jensen nods and smiles. They’re still doing the smiling a lot. Jensen is learning their language, but it takes time. Jared knows that Sam, the chief’s wife, can speak the grasslanders’ language, but Jensen never mastered that language well. Jensen was never a grasslander, but a slave traded from the people up in the north.  
  
Worried about Jensen’s time with the grasslanders, Jared had spoken with a few of the other bearers. Dani, a fierce redhead who’d been one of the first to run towards the warriors on their horses when they’d gone after the bearers, had told him a bit about Jensen’s life.  
  
The chief had kept him to himself, so Jensen hadn’t had a lot of contact with the other slaves. The chief hadn’t been overly cruel or beaten Jensen, but Jensen had still spent a full year in his tent. At night, Jensen tosses and turns in the furs next to Jared, muttering words Jared can’t understand.  
  
He only woke up once and Jared was there to soothe him, take him in his arms and murmur meaningless endearments into his ear, promising Jensen to always protect him. Jensen had given him a weak smile, but curled up in Jared’s arms to sleep.  
  
It frustrates Jared that he can’t talk to Jensen about it and that Jensen doesn’t understand when Jared tells him how well he’ll treat him. He just has to give it time.  
  
So during the evening and at night, Jared tries to tell Jensen how beautiful and how precious he is to Jared. He tries to find out what Jensen’s favorite meat is and if he prefers nuts or berries as snacks. He trades a few of his skins for baskets so Jensen can gather roots and berries with the other bearers. It’s important Jensen can make friends.  
  
Jensen seems to appreciate Jared’s efforts, but it’s difficult to tell as long as Jensen can’t say what he wants. So every day, when Jensen goes to the chief’s tent to study their language with Sam, Jared is glad for it.  
  
  
A few days later, Jensen comes back to their tent carrying a beautiful black and white pelt. It’s a skunk fur and Jared wonders where he got it from. They don’t hunt skunk for meat, but the fur is thick and long, good for a hat or the shoulder and back part of a winter jacket. It’s a rare pelt to have and a valuable commodity. Even for a bearer, it’s an extravagant gift.  
  
“Who gave you that fur?” Jared asks curiously, gesturing at the pelt.  
  
Jensen looks down at the fur, then at Jared. “Mark,” he says.  
  
“Mark? The weapons maker?”  
  
Jensen nods.  
  
“Why?” To give such a pelt away, even if one was a good hunter...  
  
“Mark say,” Jensen cocks his head, trying to remember, “beauty to beauty? No.” He shakes his head, frustrated. “Beauty for beauty?”  
  
Jared tenses. Of course. Mark had tried to take Jensen during the ceremony. It made sense that he’d try to sway Jensen, try to get him to leave Jared when the first moon of living together was over. He probably had given Jensen the bracelet as well, but Jared was too proud to ask. not that he really needed to.  
  
They had taken two handful of bearers this time, but there are still warriors without a bearer in their tent. A bearer’s favor is always highly contested. After the fertility rites, a bearer spends one moon in the tent of the one he’d chosen during the ceremony. When the moon is over, the bearer decides if he wants to stay with the warrior or move into the tent of the unmarried.  
  
Currently, there are only two bearers living there. Kara, who’d lost her husband in a hunting accident and Jus, who’d never settled for a hunter after being rescued from the grasslanders. He is older, and it’s uncertain if he even could have children anymore, so there isn’t a lot of resentment within the warriors.  
  
With this imbalance of warriors and bearers, it isn’t a surprise warriors are trying to woo bearers who are living on a trial period with someone else.  
  
“Is good pelt,” Jensen says slowly, stroking the soft fur. “Not much.”  
  
Jared clenches his jaw and nods. “There aren’t many skunks living here.”  
  
“Skunk?” Jensen asks surprised, holding up the fur.  
  
“Yes, skunk.”  
  
Jensen breaks out laughing. It’s so unexpected and such a rare sound, Jared is spellbound. Jensen is laughing with his whole body, head thrown back and chest heaving. A few people around them eye them curiously. Jared feels like he’s transported back to that day, over a year ago now, where he saw Jensen for the first time. Jensen was trying to flee the chief’s tent, fighting in all his beautiful glory. The grasslanders had their defenses already pulled together, Jared couldn’t go back, but it was at that moment, he’d sworn the next time, he would have that beautiful and fierce bearer.  
  
It takes a while for Jensen to calm down, though Jared doesn’t mind. He’s never seen the bearer so happy.  
  
“Skunk,” Jensen explains, “in home, skunk is flower. Tasty flower. Good for nose, you know?” He shakes his head amusedly and walks towards their tent. “Skunk,” he mumbles and laughs again.  
  
From across the clearing, Mark is watching. He gives Jared a smug grin, before he walks away, clearly very pleased with himself.  
  
“It shouldn’t surprise you,” a disapproving voice says behind Jared and he turns around to see Sam, the chief’s bearer-wife, standing behind him. “Jensen is a very beautiful man, strong and smart. Honestly, I was expecting more warriors to vie for his attention, but they might be too scared of you. For now. If they see Mark succeeding….”  
  
Jared clenches his fists. “What do you propose I do? It’s not like I can beat them all up.” Even though the thought is tempting.  
  
Sam hits him up the back of his head. “No, you fool. You’re supposed to fight for Jensen. Show him how much you care for him!”  
  
“But I do,” Jared protests. “I tell him every day how beautiful he is, how wonderful—”  
  
“When you’re in bed?” Sam asks with a raised eyebrow. “Think about it, Jared. Right now, what are you doing to show him your affection? Sharing your tent and your sleeping roll with him? Now that’s not showing him you care. That’s just showing him you like a warm body next to yours when you sleep.”  
  
Jared is stumped. He thought his affection had been obvious. Sam must see something on his face because she takes pity on him.  
  
“We can all see how much you care,” she says and pats his arm. “But Jensen, he doesn’t know you like we do and he’s only just learning our language. He doesn’t know the nuances and the implications. You need to find another way to show him.”  
  
Jared tells her thanks and makes his way back to his tent. Jensen is sitting on a mat in front of it, sewing the skunk fur with the rather mediocre looking deer skin Jared brought him a few days ago to make a jacket. Sam was right, Jared thinks shamed. He should lavish Jensen with beautiful gifts to show him how much he cares. He should show Jensen the effort he’s making. So Jared goes inside, collects his slings and tells Jensen he’ll be back for dinner.  
  
Jensen nods, but doesn’t look up from his work.  
  
On Sundancer’s back, it doesn’t take Jared too long to descend the mountain for the lower valleys. He spends the rest of the afternoon setting his traps and hopes he’ll find one or two of the little ermines the next day. They don’t have their white winter fur yet, but their black tipped tail is a favorite amongst Jared’s people.  
  
When he returns, Jensen is already cooking a stew on the fireplace. He shoots Jared a short glance, but after looking at Jared’s empty bag, he turns back to the meal. Jared wants to explain about the traps, but he isn’t sure how much Jensen would understand. Bearers don’t hunt and don’t know about hunting techniques, so Jared just hopes Jensen will be impressed when he shows up tomorrow with a bag full of ermines.  
  
Jensen isn’t.  
  
Jared returns the next days from his trip with two ermines. He’s proud of himself for putting the traps up so well, but Jensen just gives him a bland smile, tapping the ermine’s black tails before going back to working on his jacket.  
  
“They’re good for clothes decorating,” Jared tries, but Jensen shakes his head in that way that means he doesn’t know the words.  
  
Out of a big lidded basket in a corner, Jared gets his own winter jacket, the seams lined with ermine tails. Jensen eyes the jacket, then the two ermines. He says something in his own language, which sounds like a question.  
  
Angrily, he shakes his head. “Much?” he asked, then corrects himself. “No. More? More svilka? I get more svilka?”  
  
Jared assumes svilkas are ermines, and he nods. “Yeah, sure, I can get you more. You’re right, two are not enough. I’ll set some more traps tomorrow.”  
  
Jensen opens his mouth, then sighs and closes it again. He just smiles at Jared and takes the ermines. He carries them outside, probably down to the river to clean them out. Well, putting up slings is not Jared’s favorite way of hunting, but if Jensen wants more ermines, he’ll get more ermines. He hopes it will show Jensen how Jared cares for him, but when Jensen goes back to work with the skunk pelt, Jared still feels deflated. It doesn’t get better when, after dinner, Mark comes by and pretends he wants to show Jared the new spear thrower he made out of the antlers of a huge deer he hunted last week. Mark’s father is their weapons maker, but Mark is learning the trade. Of course, Mark has no interest in showing Jared, instead he makes sure Jensen sees and hears everything.  
  
And Jensen — Jensen is entranced. He watches avidly as Mark explains the new design — it’s not new at all, he just changed the proportions a bit — and he’s got this look of concentration of his face he always gets when he listens and tries to figure out what unknown words mean. Occasionally, Jared catches Jensen mouthing some of the words, as if he’s trying to memorize them.  
  
Jared tries to get rid of Mark without being obvious, but the other warrior still smirks at him when he leaves. That night, when Jared and Jensen crawl under the furs, Jensen turns his back to Jared. Jared stares into the darkness of his tent and wonders why things are going so wrong.  
  
  
  
Over the next several days, Jared tries to pay more attention to Jensen, bring him more exotic presents. He goes upstream to fish and while Jensen seems to like the taste, there’s no change in demeanor.  
  
While Jared was away, Jensen apparently spent his time sitting with Mark. Sam tells Jared with a disapproving glare that he’s neglecting Jensen so much, the bearer is actually listening to Mark go on and on about the right wood to make weapons and where to find the best flint for spear tips. Mark doesn’t care that Jensen will never need to know any of that, he’s just happy he can brag about his skills.  
  
Jared squares his jaw and promises to do better. He ventures up into the steep and rocky part of the mountain to collect a few of the blue-lined gemstones and has Alona, their jewelry maker, make them into a necklace.  
  
Jensen says thanks, but doesn’t put it on. Jared is hurt, before he realizes that Jensen has no idea that these stones are very hard to get and something to show off. Jared needs to do something for Jensen that Jensen will understand before the choosing ceremony. Jensen needs to understand Jared will do everything for him, will do everything to make him happy here.  
  
  
  
It takes Jared two days to hunt down the giant boar the clan had only caught glimpses of in the flatter parts of the mountain range. Boars are rare in their lands and this one was particularly big and very aggressive. Usually Jared isn’t one to seek out risks while hunting, but he isn’t afraid either. Ever since he faced the giant brown bear during his initiation rite, there’s nothing out there that can scare him. He’d felt the deadly embrace of the bear, still wears the scars to prove it, the scars Jensen likes to press his hand against, and if this is what it will take to make Jensen see, then so be it.  
  
The way back takes him longer because he has to walk next to Sundancer; the boar and Jared would be too heavy for the horse to carry for long.  
  
The clans-people are excited and impressed — such a large animal will be shared by all and it’s the perfect meal for the choosing ceremony — but Jensen’s expression… He looks impressed, definitely. There’s a gleam in his big eyes and he nods at Jared in congratulation. But there’s something missing. Something Jared doesn’t know how to interpret. Yes, Jensen is impressed by Jared, is touched and unable to speak when Jared gets off his horse, kneels in front of Jensen and offers him the boar’s tusks, but there is still something. Something that makes Jared uneasy about the ceremony.  
  
That evening, when the setting sun is casting long shadows over the mountains, Jared finds Jensen sitting in the small clearing in the middle of the saplings growing behind their tent, slowly turning the tusks over and over in his hands.  
  
“Why?” he asks.  
  
Jared hesitates, wonders how to phrase it so Jensen will understand. “Beauty for beauty?”  
  
Jensen snorts. “This no skunk fur. Tjaka is dangerous animal. This one is very big.”  
  
“Yeah. Are there... tjaka? Boar where you come from?”  
  
“Boar?” Jensen slowly repeats. “Yes. Big boar, but smaller tooth. Very dangerous. Attack people.”  
  
Jared nods.  
  
“Why?” Jensen asks again.  
  
“Because I wanted to give you something that proves I will do anything for you.”  
  
Jensen looks at him quizzically.  
  
“I love you,” Jared says slowly, pressing his hand to his heart. “I want you. Always. And I want only the best things for you.” He scoots closer, drawn in by the look in Jensen’s eyes, as green as the mountain meadows. Jared has never seen eyes as green as Jensen’s.  
  
“Jensen, I will give you whatever you want.”  
  
Jensen tilts his head, eyes burning intensely into Jared’s. “What I want,” he repeats and Jared nods fiercely.  
  
“Anything you want.”  
  
He reaches out, traces the sharp line of Jensen’s jaw, the swell of his plush bottom lip and when Jensen leans slightly into the touch, Jared can’t resist anymore. He leans forward, pressing his mouth to Jensen’s.  
  
“Anything,” he says between kisses. “Anything you want.”  
  
Jensen kisses back, wild and with abandon, leaning into Jared. Jared can’t help himself, he pushes Jensen back into the grass, crawling over his body.  
  
The bracelet around Jensen’s arm catches Jared’s eye. A present from Mark. Jared covers it with his hand.  
  
“Stay with me,” he whispers into Jensen's neck, articulating the words for the first time. “Forget about Mark. Tomorrow, chose me. Stay with me.”  
  
One of Jensen’s hands slides into Jared’s hair and tries to pull him back, but Jared only moves until he’s nose to nose with Jensen, keeping him pinned to the ground with his hand.  
  
“Please,” he says, and leans in to kiss Jensen. “Please stay with me, Jensen.”  
  
Jensen makes a broken kind of noise and kisses him back, pushes his hips up into Jared and their erections rub against each other.  
  
The urge to fuck Jensen, to possess him, to become one with him, it’s too strong and Jared starts stripping them of their clothes hurriedly. The string holding Jensen’s pants tears but Jared doesn’t care, only cares about getting Jensen naked, about seeing all his beautiful pale skin stretched over strong, lean muscles spread out in front of him. He leans down to trace all the little golden spots on Jensen’s skin and Jensen arches up into Jared’s mouth.  
  
Wrapping a leg around Jared’s hip, Jensen draws him in and Jared can feel Jensen’s dampness at the tip of his dick. But not yet. Jared wants to take his time, wants to take Jensen apart, make him feel it in every one of his bones, just like Jared feels his affection for Jensen with every fiber of his being.  
  
Slowly, Jared starts trailing a line of kisses up Jensen’s neck, latches onto the point he knows makes Jensen crazy while he reaches down between Jensen’s legs to feel the proof of his arousal.  
  
Jensen’s panting now, head thrown back and hands frenziedly running up and down Jared’s back, gripping his shoulders for support and pulling his hair to get him to move, but Jared is going to stay right where he is, worship Jensen’s body like he deserves to be.  
  
He slides two fingers into Jensen’s body, feels his heat and his wetness, can’t get enough of Jensen’s muscles clenching and unclenching around him, of the little moans Jensen makes whenever Jared rubs the right spot.  
  
“Jared.” Jensen’s voice is rough and barely more than a whisper, and Jared knows, he’s close already.  
  
But Jared doesn’t want him to come, not yet, not like this. He wants to feel Jensen unravel around him, when Jared’s buried deep inside of him. So he pulls his fingers back, contents himself with gently tracing Jensen’s rim and raising his head to pepper Jensen’s mouth with teasing kisses.  
  
“Jared.” This time, Jensen still sounds aroused, but decidedly more demanding and Jared grins, can’t help it.  
  
He slides his fingers back in, and Jensen raises his hips, tries to take him deeper.  
  
“More,” he says and it’s a command more than anything.  
  
It’s not what Jared wants, not what he needs. He needs Jensen to beg, needs himself to be the only one who can give Jensen this. He needs Jensen to choose him, right here.  
  
So he kisses him deep and without giving him a chance to catch his breath. Jensen moans into his mouth, trails his hands down Jared’s back and grips his ass. Jared hisses and sucks in a breath, needs to get himself under control.  
  
Jensen’s smile is sharp in the fading light, the sun slowly disappearing behind the mountains. Jensen’s beauty is ethereal in the muted light, proof of his alienness only enhanced by the twilight. Jared moves his head down, can’t look at him without losing himself. He kisses and bites at Jensen‘s neck, marking him so everyone will know the bearer is his.  
  
One of Jensen's hands slides into Jared’s hair, pulls at the long strands and Jared’s hips push forwards, rubbing his dick along Jensen’s thigh. It’s not enough and he can’t hold back anymore. He scoots up again, and his breath is so ragged, he can’t kiss Jensen, can just press their mouths against each other, sharing air, while he slowly pushes into the welcoming heat of Jensen’s body.  
  
Jensen lets out a cry that resonates in the trees, and Jared starts to fuck him, hips moving on their own accord, nothing holding him back. He needs to take Jensen, be as close to him as possible, and Jensen does his best to keep him close.  
  
It doesn’t take long. Jensen’s been on edge for a while and Jared can’t hold back, not when Jensen is so perfect under him, so warm and wanting, moaning Jared’s name on every breathy exhale, a litany of begs and praises, ripped out of him by every one of Jared’s thrusts.  
  
When Jensen comes, he throws his head back and Jared surges down to bite at the mark he already left. Around him, Jensen tightens and it pushes Jared violently over the edge, making his whole body shudder as the force of his orgasm takes his breath away.  
  
They lie panting in the grass while the light disappears behind the mountains and they’re shrouded in darkness.  
  
“Stay,” Jared says into the night.  
  
Jensen sighs. “I need…” He doesn’t finish his thought.  
  
“What do you need?”  
  
Jensen stands up. “Morning,” he says. “I tell you morning.”  
  
Quickly, Jared gets to his feet and follows Jensen in the direction of their tent. He doesn’t know what Jensen will ask for, but he will give it to him. He will give him everything.  
  
  
  
The next morning, Jensen seems nervous, but there’s a determined line around his mouth. He rummages around in the pile of furs in the back of their tent and then pulls out a large bow. It looks a little like the small bows Jared’s people use for bird hunting, but he’s never seen one so big. It’s even longer than Jensen’s legs and the wood is thicker. It’s strung tight with a thick tendon.  
  
Jensen is also holding a bunch of arrows, as long as his arms with sharp flint tips.  
  
“Where did you get that?” Jared asks, reaching out to take the weapons from Jensen.  
  
Bearers aren’t allowed to touch weapons. Everybody knows that instruments of death are harmful to fertility and bring bad luck to bearers.  
  
But Jensen doesn’t hand over the weapons. Instead, he clutches them tighter and says, “I make them.”  
  
Jared is sure Jensen meant something else.  
  
“Jensen, who made these? I know you have them now, but who gave them to you? Was it Mark?”  
  
Jensen shakes his head angrily. “I make them. My bow. My arrows.” He looks Jared dead in the eyes. “I hunt.”  
  
Jared thinks he heard wrong. “What?”  
  
Jensen holds the bow up, knocks an arrow. “I hunt.”  
  
Jared shakes his head. “No. Jensen, I don’t know what you think you're doing or where you got this bow from, but you don’t. Bearers don’t hunt.”  
  
Jensen glares and Jared tries to figure out why Jensen thinks he has to hunt.  
  
“Look, if you want more furs, or better furs, I’ll get them for you. I can hunt more.”  
  
Jensen shakes his head desperately. “No. I hunt. I always hunt.”  
  
That can’t be right. Jensen is a bearer, surely no one in their right mind would let a bearer hunt.  
  
“Jensen—”  
  
“No!” Jensen cuts him off with a harsh gesture. “I hunt. In home, I always hunt. I am good hunter!”  
  
Jared stares, taken aback. With the determination on Jensen’s face, Jared doesn’t doubt his words anymore, but how could Jensen’s people let him hunt? Bearers are much too precious to face the risks of hunting, too delicate to face the harsh conditions, and too sacred to take another life.  
  
“Jensen,” he starts desperately, not knowing how to deal with this but unable to see Jensen holding a weapon any longer. “Look, that was wrong, okay? You shouldn’t hunt. And here, you don’t have to. I’ll take care of you.”  
  
Angrily, Jensen shakes his head. “I hunt. I always hunt. I am hunter.” His expression is filled with frustration, like once again, the words aren’t enough.  
  
“Jensen, you can’t hunt,” Jared tries to explain again. “You won’t be able to have children. No children, Jensen.”  
  
Jensen scoffs. “I can have children and hunt.”  
  
Jared is heartbroken. Jensen is a few years older than him, should already have given birth to many children, but Jared knows he hasn’t. Back home, before he was captured and enslaved, Jensen had never been pregnant.  
  
“Jensen,” he says as gently as he can, “if you hunted back home, that’s why you never were pregnant.”  
  
Jensen looks at him in complete bewilderment.  
  
“If you hunt,” Jared tries to explain, “you can’t get pregnant. You can’t get blessed with life if you kill."  
  
Jensen shakes his head. “No.”  
  
Jared nods, taking a step towards him. He needs to get this strange bow out of Jensen’s hands. “Yes. Jensen trust me, we know. Just, give me the bow, okay?”  
  
Jensen narrows his eyes and takes a step back. Jared doesn’t know what’s hurting him more, that Jensen doesn’t trust him or that he grew up in such a harmful environment.  
  
“Jensen, give me the bow. I promise you, I’ll take care of you. You’ll never have to hunt again, okay? And you’ll see, we’ll have children soon.”  
  
Jensen stiffens and he takes a deep breath. “I am hunter,” he says. “You say you want me, but you don’t. You want children.”  
  
“With you!”  
  
“I am hunter,” Jensen says again, sad this time.  
  
“Not here,” Jared says. “You can’t. Even if you want to risk never having children, it would bring bad luck to the whole clan. So please Jensen, just put the bow down.”  
  
Finally, after a long pause, Jensen does. Carefully, he lays the bow and the arrows down on the ground, fingers brushing along the wood before he straightens up again.  
  
Relief floods Jared and he smiles at Jensen. Maybe they’d have to do a cleaning ritual, he’ll have to ask the shaman, but for now it’s alright. Surely the spirits will understand that Jensen comes from a different place, that his desire to hunt was born from ignorance rather than defiance. Surely it’s not too late for them to have a family.  
  
Before Jared can say anything else, the drums start to beat, calling the people into the middle of the village. The ceremony is just about to begin.  
  
Quickly, Jared ushers Jensen outside. Jensen walks woodenly, expression tense. Jared puts a soothing arm around him; hearing these truths about his upbringing must be hard for Jensen, but he just shrugs it off and walks over to the group of bearers standing with Sam.  
  
This ceremony is simple. Every new bearer’s name is called, asking them who they chose. Either they chose one of the hunters to live with or they chose the tent of the unmarried.  
  
One after another, Sam calls their name and most of the bearers chose a warrior — either the one who rescued them or another they grew close to. Out of the two handfuls, only two chose to live with the unmarried and Jared knows that Dani is already flirting with his friend Chad, so she might move out of there again soon.  
  
Jensen is the last to be asked. He shoots Jared a long look, filled with longing and sadness and Jared’s throat closes up. No. He was so sure Jensen would pick him, especially after last night. But of course, Jensen is angry and confused now, he doesn’t understand yet why he can’t hunt.  
  
Jared tries to brace himself, but when Jensen says he chooses the tent of the unmarried, it’s still a harsh blow.  
  
Distantly, he hears surprised murmurings of the rest of the crowd, sees Mark smirk smugly, but Jared can only focus on Jensen. Jensen, who’s still so beautiful, standing proudly in the middle of a crowd full of people that are still strangers to him. Jensen, who’s looking at Jared with regret and determination. Jensen, who turns to Dani, and together, they walk towards the big tent the unmarried share.  
  
Jared takes a deep breath. He saw the regret in Jensen’s eyes, he knows he still has a chance. Jensen just needs some time to get over their hunting rules. Jared will just have to make sure Mark doesn’t get too close to him in the meantime.  
  
  
  
  
Living without Jensen feels lonely. Jared never felt like this before; he has friends in the clan and he likes having his tent to himself. Jensen only stayed with him for a moon, and yet Jared finds himself reaching for him in the morning when he wakes up, waits to see him sitting in front of his tent when he returns. He’s gotten so used to Jensen, to his quiet smiles and warm, strong body, Jared hadn’t realized missing him would almost feel like a physical ache.  
  
They never talked much, Jensen’s speech too limited, but Jared misses their conversations too. Misses Jensen explaining things with words, and hands and feet, misses Jensen scrunch up his face when he’s thinking and he’s satisfied expression when he voiced a complex thought.  
  
So during the day, Jared finds himself wandering past the tent Jensen lives in now, but he’s never there. He only sees him in the evening, when Jensen eats dinner at the great communal fire. Most families eat in their own tent, but the chief’s wife always prepares a dinner for those who want to come eat.  
  
Jensen doesn’t avoid Jared, but he doesn’t approach either. Jared tries to talk to him, but Jensen isn’t all that forthcoming, and Jared realizes he doesn’t know what they should talk about. They had been so focused on the day-to-day stuff, on Jensen learning their customs, Jared had never asked about him. And when Jensen stands at the fire, yellow-red flames throwing dancing shadows over his features, Jared realizes he has no idea what he’s thinking, what’s going on in his mind. He resolves to change that.  
  
His sole comfort is that Jensen is completely ignoring Mark. Hared saw Mark trying to approach him a few times, but Jensen was very brusque and made in unmistakably clear he wasn’t interested. Tonight, Mark doesn’t even try, just shoots Jensen furtive glances. Jared can’t help the feeling of hope in his chest. Jensen is still talking to him, after all.  
  
The next morning, Jared gets up early and goes to Jensen’s tent. Dani and Kara are just leaving for the river to wash, but Jensen’s already dressed for the day.  
  
“Hey. What are you doing today?”  
  
Jensen shrugs, eying him warily.  
  
Jared nods over his shoulder, to where a small path leads towards the clan’s paddock.  
  
“Has anyone taught you to ride yet?”  
  
Jensen’s eyes go wide. Jared didn’t try to teach him before, not because bearers never ride, but it’s just not that important, and most newcomers to the tribe are wary of sitting on a horse’s back. But Jared has seen Jensen watch the riders curiously and pet the horses, so really, it’s time.  
  
“I can ride?” Jensen asks, sounding skeptical.  
  
Jared nods. “Yeah, of course.”  
  
“I can ride,” Jensen states, “but no hunt.”  
  
Jared tries not to make a face. “That’s different,” he tries to explain. “You cannot take a life.”  
  
Jensen snorts, but takes a step toward him. “Okay. You teach me ride.”  
  
  
  
  
It goes much smoother than Jared anticipated. Jensen is not afraid of the horses and he’s not afraid of falling down or going fast. He’s got a good posture and enough body tension that he sits fairly securely on the horse’s back. Jared chose Buttercup, one of the tamer mares in the herd, to teach Jensen, but really, Jensen is a natural. Jared needn’t have worried.  
  
The best thing about it is Jensen’s smile. As soon as they’re out of the paddock, when Jensen insisted he could handle more than just riding in a circle at a walk, Jensen’s whole face lights up. They even gallop a short distance and Jensen’s laughter is pure joy. Jared thinks he should have taught Jensen much earlier.  
  
“We’ll talk to the chief,” Jared says. “When the mares foal next spring, we should get you your own horse.”  
  
Jensen’s smile is so bright, it takes Jared's breath away. Instinctively, he reaches out to trail a hand along Jensen’s cheek. For a moment, Jensen leans into it, then he pulls back.  
  
“Thank you,” he says, sounding much more sober.  
  
Jared nods, but his heart aches. He loves this side of Jensen, the fearless and strong one that had impressed him so much the first time he’d seen Jensen. Jared had never been really attracted to a specific bearer before, but seeing Jensen try to fight his way out of his captivity, face determined and fierce, Jared had known he’d found his match. He’d been so fascinated by Jensen, this beautiful creature, so different than the other bearers he’d known and grown up with. His mind had been made up right that moment and he’d known he needed to have Jensen.  
  
For a moment, Jared can’t help but wonder what Jensen would look like on a hunt, but he pushes the thought aside. It’s blasphemy.  
  
  
  
  
The following days, Jared continues his riding lessons. Jensen thrives, pushing himself and the horse harder and through more difficult terrain. He even persuades Jared to teach him how to jump. Jared wants to say no, it's really too dangerous, but Jensen is turning into such a good rider and Jared just can’t say no to him anyway. When he sees Jensen guide Buttercup over a fallen tree log, sees how his body moves in perfect sync with the horse, he’s not even really surprised. Jensen’s physicality has always been impressive. Jared is not used seeing that in bearers, but then, Jensen has always been different from what Jared has known. And it still gives him the same rush it had back when he’d seen Jensen the first time.  
  
That night, around the fire, Jared catches Mark’s disgruntled expression after Jensen gushes to him about how great it is to ride. Jared should have known it would backfire on him.  
  
  
  
  
“So I ride. I am good rider, yes?” Jensen asks, and there’s something challenging in his voice.  
  
Jared nods. “Of course. You’re really good.”  
  
“I am good rider. I can be good hunter.”  
  
Jared should have known Jensen would not let it go. “”I’m sure you are,” he says, and he realizes he’s not just trying to placate Jensen, he believes him. He’s seen the strength and self-control he displays when he’s riding, felt his sinuous and sure movements when they’re sharing a bed. “But that’s not what it is about. It’s forbidden, Jensen, because it’s bad luck. The spirits forbid it. You, as a bearer, are sacred. You bring life. Please understand,” Jared says beseechingly.  
  
It becomes harder to say the words, harder to deny Jensen what’s obviously a part of him, something Jared is sure he’d excel at. But they can’t defy the spirits. For a moment, he wonders how people back at Jensen’s home dealt with bearers and hunting, if all of them were allowed to. Maybe Jensen’s people hadn’t known? And maybe when the spirit’s blessing had left them, the slave raiders had come to their lands. Jared can’t risk something like that happening here.  
  
Stubbornly, Jensen is still shaking his head. “No. My life. My choice.”  
  
“No, Jensen. It would bring back luck to the whole clan!” Jared hates to see how Jensen’s face closes off and he realizes Jensen actually hoped this would change everything.  
  
“Look, why don’t you talk to the shaman about it? She can explain it much better than I can.” Clearly, Jared is not getting through to Jensen, maybe someone else will have more luck.  
  
Jensen’s shoulders sag and resignation spreads over his features. “Yes,” is all he says, but it might as well mean ‘I am disappointed in you, I am sad, I am exhausted, why can’t I be me?’ and Jared’s heart aches. He wonders if Jensen still has the bow.  
  
  
  
For the next few days, Jensen avoids him, leaves the tent before Jared can show up and ask him to come ride with him. When he asks Dani, she tells him Jensen leaves with the rising sun.  
  
When Jared wakes early the next morning, he forces himself out of bed as quick as he can. Outside his tent, he just catches Jensen disappearing into the tree line, the large bow strung over his shoulder. Jared curses and goes to look for his own weapons.  
  
  
  
Jared takes his own weapons and follows Jensen’s tracks. No matter how often Jensen said he could hunt, Jared still fears for his safety, his fertility. When bearers take a life, it brings bad luck and malignancy from the spirits. But Jared realizes he might not be able to stop Jensen. He certainly can’t force him. He wonders if the shaman would try to banish him; what the chief would do. He wonders what will happen to Jensen. He wonders why the spirits have given him the talents of a hunter when he is a bearer. He wonders if maybe Jensen was meant to turn out this way.  
  
  
Quietly, Jared moves through the forest. He finds Jensen perched on a high rock when the sun is already high up in the sky, sitting against the wind of a small clearing where a herd of deer is grazing. He has a look of utter concentration on his face, body poised and muscles pulled tight, ready to move. There’s a glint in his eye and his cheeks are flushed. He has never looked so beautiful.  
  
Jensen must have heard him move, because he shoots Jared a challenging look, and Jared puts his hands up, indicating he won’t interfere. He wants nothing more than to take the bow out of Jensen’s hands, but if he’s set on hunting, Jared can't stop him. He prays to the spirits of the hunt, the mighty bear, the ferocious wolf, and the sleek cat. He prays for their forgiveness and their protection.  
  
With sure movements, Jensen notches an arrow. The muscles in his arms tense and he holds the big bow steady, taking aim at the animals.  
  
They’re too far away for a spear throw, and even with a spear thrower, Jared isn’t sure if he could make the shot. Jensen doesn’t seem bothered.  
  
The deer look up, startled by something, and Jensen curses and lets the arrow fly. It shoots through the air quicker than Jared thought it could and when he looks back to the deer, they’re already bouncing off, one of them trailing behind, the arrow lodged deep into its side.  
  
Jared doesn’t have time to be impressed because Jensen is already up and running after the deer. Jared swears and follows him.  
  
Jensen runs quickly, footsteps quiet and swift, evading tree branches and roots with years of practice. He’s so fast that Jared has trouble keeping up. It doesn't take long until they have the wounded deer in their sights. The animal has slowed down to a labored walk, blood trailing down its side. Jensen takes a second arrow from a long pouch on his back, closing the distance to only a few feet, when something large and brown falls from a tree onto the deer's back.  
  
The deer stumbles to the ground and Jared reaches for his knife, curses that he left his spear back on the rock, because there’s a large lynx sitting on the dying deer, turning to hiss at Jensen. Jared’s heart is pounding out of his chest and he speeds up, trying to close the distance between them.  
  
Jensen only hesitates for a moment, then shoots at the cat who’s already jumping at him. The arrow grazes the cat and it collides midair with Jensen.  
  
Jared screams, but he’s too far away. He sprints towards them, his lungs burning. The lynx buries Jensen under him but then it yowls and its body goes slack. Jared reaches them just when Jensen pushes the dead lynx off of him, an arrow protruding from the animal's chest.  
  
Jared kneels down to check Jensen for injuries and his heart sinks when he sees Jensen’s shirt ripped and bloody.  
  
“Not bad hurt,” Jensen says, trying for a smile even though he’s obviously in pain.  
  
Jared carefully pulls the shirt back and, relieved, he sees that Jensen is right. There are four scratches on his chest, but they’re shallow and not bleeding too badly.  
  
Jensen looks down at them thoughtfully, then he reaches up to place a hand on Jared’s chest, right above his scar.  
  
“Hunter,” he says, then he carefully touches the scratches on his chest. “Hunter.”  
  
Jared stares down at the claw marks on Jensen's chest, so similar to the ones the bear gave him during his initiation right. Not every hunter is marked, in fact it’s rare to be confronted by a powerful predator, but it’s considered a huge honor and a blessing. Only the greatest hunters face nature’s deadliest predators and survive.  
  
Jensen is marked by a lynx. Jensen is blessed.  
  
Jared looks up and around in the forest. He can’t see them, only the shaman can, but he knows the spirits have spoken. Of course it would be the cat spirit to mark Jensen’s lithe and strong body.  
  
Jensen is a hunter.  
  
“Yes,” Jared says, throat tight. “You are a hunter.”  
  
Jensen's eyes search his face, as if he’s trying to make sure.  
  
Jared reaches down without hesitation. He gathers some of the blood and draws a line on each of Jensen’s cheeks, then a circle around the scar.  
  
“The spirits have blessed you. You are a hunter.”  
  
Jensen’s smile is radiant.  
  
Helpless, Jared smiles back. Then he realizes what this means.  
  
“Jensen, if we tell the shaman, they might let you hunt.”  
  
Jensen freezes, then looks away. Jared lets go of his hand and numbly watches Jensen get up and start cutting the lynx open. He takes the animal’s still warm heart, and after speaking a few words in his own tongue, he reverently buries the heart in the forest ground.  
  
In Jared’s clan, the hunters burn the heart of the animal they kill so their spirit can return to the land. Apparently, Jensen’s people bury the heart, give it back to the earth. It makes sense, too.  
  
In silence, Jared helps Jensen eviscerate the lynx and the deer. It takes them the whole day and in the evening, when they're eating fresh meat, the furs stretched out to dry, Jared takes the teeth he broke out of the lynx’s jaws and strings them up in a necklace.  
  
He holds them out to Jensen. “They are yours. They are your blessing.” Pointing to the bear teeth he wears around his neck, he adds, “They will protect you while you hunt.”  
  
Jensen nods solemnly and puts the necklace around his neck. He touches Jared’s necklace. “Kharu,” he says with a soft smile, then he puts his hand on his own, new necklace. “Dehran.”  
  
Jared puts his hand over Jensen’s. “Dehran,” he repeats. Somehow, it fits. “We should go back,” he says after a heavy silence, “before night falls.”  
  
Again, Jensen hesitates, tenses up. “If shaman and chief says no, say I can not hunt…”  
  
Jared doesn’t want to think so, but there’s no precedent. Nothing like this has ever happened before.  
  
No one in their clan has seen Jensen the way Jared has, had looked beneath the beautiful bearer’s facade to see the strength and daring underneath. They don’t know Jensen is prudent on a stake out, quick and fearless in the face of danger. They don’t know he is a true hunter.  
  
Jared was there, he saw when the cat attacked Jensen. The lynx, who wasn’t even supposed to be so close to their settlement, who usually avoided humans, didn't go looking for the conflict. Jared knows what this was; a test by the spirits. And if their clan doesn’t want to accept that….  
  
He takes Jensen’s hand. “You are a hunter. I have seen it. And I’m sorry I didn’t see it before, but I needed to know it was okay. I needed to know you wouldn’t be cursed.”  
  
Jensen rolls his eyes. He might not take the spirits seriously, but Jared knows what just happened.  
  
“I’ll make sure you can hunt,” Jared says. “I promise.”  
  
“What if not?” Jensen asks.  
  
Jared takes a deep breath. He has never defied his chief or his shaman. But he is a man of the hunt, of the spirits. He still remembers the bear’s embrace. And he loves Jensen. He hadn’t even realised how infatuated he was in the beginning until he got to know this stronger, fiercer side of Jensen. There is a whole other side to him that Jared has only caught glimpses of before, and he cannot wait to discover more of it.  
  
“If they can’t accept it,” Jared says, “if they make you leave, then I will go with you, if you want.”  
  
It’s a monumental decision, but Jared knows he has to follow the spirit's guiding his heart.  
  
Jensen takes a step towards him, reaches for his hand.  
  
Jared wants to lean down and kiss him, but he doesn’t. He wants Jensen to take the first step. When Jensen squeezes his hand, he thinks he might not have to wait that long. Whatever happens, they’ll face it together.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find find me on tumblr [here](ashtray-thief.tumblr.com).


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